The Parade of Life

I was raised in church, heard the church stories took them at face value and realized just how big and powerful God really is. In my spiritual quest though, I never really questioned the existence of God, but at times I questioned His existence in me. I think it is usually the times that I am going through what we seem are "bad times". That is according to us because we can't see the ultimate result of what's going to happen. It's at those times I feel that God has left me. Why should I have to suffer. It's the "Job syndrome" of why me what have I done to deserve you to leave me?" Reflecting on the past valley's I have seen that God was more with me there than ever before. It was in those dark valley's where I was forced to think. Forced to question my own existence and meaning. Forced to realize that becoming a better person requires training, this was training.

I never been in the military, but I have had friends that have been. They talk about how rough boot camp is. It strips you down then builds you back up to a better man, a better leader. I think that sometimes we go through boot camps in our own lives. We are stripped of all of securities that we hold on to. We are forced to be naked seeing who we really are, what are character is really like. We go through some rough life exercises. We are forced to see what we are really made of. A testing of our "testimony". At the end, God wants us to be a stronger person, a stronger leader for His cause. Am I alone when I'm in this "Life Boot camp"?
To answer the question, I reflect on my past spiritual boot camps. I went through quite a bit of changes. I rebelled, I got mad, I cried, I was broken and then I was restored. As a result, I always was a stronger man. The existence of God in me during those times was very evident. He was probably more there with me during those (these) times than the times where life was just one big arboretum in the spring. I say that because when things are going just right, I tend to focus more on myself and how great I have it, thanking God at a distance. Waving at Him as if I am on the float in a parade and He is on the side. I wave at Him, giving Him a wink just to say thanks.

The lesson to possibly learn, God wants to exist in my life even more when I'm on that float. After all, He is the Grand Marshall.